New state police LGBT liaison named

Massachusetts State Police Lt. Barbara Bennett recalls her initial response to Sgt. Lorraine Cambria's suggestion that Bennett apply to succeed her as the State Police Liaison to the LGBT Community: "I'm not a parade-marcher."

Indeed, for much of her 25-year career with the State Police, Bennett practiced what she called her "own personal 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell'" - her friends on the force know she is gay, otherwise, it's nobody else's concern. Bennett, 48, kept her professional and personal lives separate. "I wanted to be known as a good trooper," Bennett explained. "I didn't want to be known as a gay trooper, so I just wanted to build my reputation and do my job."

But the death of a close friend and fellow trooper two years ago forced her to re-evaluate the importance of friends and family in her life. And her spouse, Susan Packard, with whom Bennett has shared the last 12 years, was certainly a part of her family. Hiding her sexual orientation no longer seemed worth the trouble.

Cambria was soon to retire from the force after more than two decades of service and would thus vacate the LGBT liaison position that she had held since 1999. Bennett, who was aware Cambria was retiring but hadn't given the LGBT liaison job a second thought told Cambria she'd take the weekend to mull her suggestion. Bennett discussed the job with Packard, who enthusiastically encouraged her to apply for it. "She's an architect," said Bennett of her spouse, who she married in 2004. "Her world is much different than the police world as far as ... easy acceptance [of gay co-workers], if you will. She was all for it."

Cambria thought Bennett's years of experience in the department's public affairs office would serve her well in the liaison position. Additionally, said Cambria, the LGBT liaison is also required to conduct trainings for fellow troopers and Bennett had formerly conducted trooper trainings for the state's Criminal Justice Training Council. That's where she and Bennett first met, when Cambria was a rookie trooper. They remained friends over the course of their careers. "I just really respect her and I think she's an outstanding person," said Cambria. "And I think she'll do an outstanding job for the community at large." Over the course of the weekend, Bennett also concluded that she was more than qualified for the job. She submitted her resum? on the following Monday and beat out a handful of other applicants in the selection process. Bennett assumed her duties shortly after Cambria's July 31 retirement.

Bennett credited Cambria, who was a familiar presence at LGBT events and an active member of the Gay Officers Action League of New England (GOAL/NE), with bringing "drive and compassion" to her role as the LGBT liaison. "My aim is to continue that with my own style," said Bennett. "I'm all about fairness and I believe that anyone who has an encounter with the State Police should be treated fairly and respectfully," she added, "and that's what I'd like to get out to people - that I promise that that is high on my ... list or criteria [for] being the GBLT State Police liaison." Bennett, who is the third State Police LGBT liaison since the position was instituted in the late 1990s under former colonel John DiFava, also wants to be a resource for the LGBT community on State Police policy and procedure. "[I]f they need a question answered or something has happened that they'd like to understand what our rules and regulations are, or our policies or other issues, I'm there as a support system for them, to help them understand what our organization is about."

Bennett's role as LGBT liaison comes two years after what she called "a personal epiphany" about being more open about her personal life on the job. On their way to a weekend getaway in Provincetown on July 22, 2005, Bennett and Packard were approaching the Sagamore Bridge when Bennett got word that State Trooper Vincent Cila, a close friend since they attended the State Police Academy together, had been hospitalized in Boston after losing control of his motorcycle in the Sumner Tunnel while on patrol. Troopers urged Bennett to get to the hospital. Cila's prognosis wasn't good. The couple immediately turned the car around.

From their first day at the academy, Bennett and Cila bonded over their shared roots in Malden, where Bennett grew up in a large Irish-Catholic family and Cila was raised by his Italian-American parents. Cila graduated from Malden High School a year after Bennett. They shared rides back and forth from Malden to Western Mass., where the academy is located, and spent weekends studying together. Afterward, Cila's mother dished out ample portions of pasta. They helped each other endure the rigors of State Police training. "To have a support system when you're going through an experience like that is just very helpful," said Bennett. Cila asked Bennett about the rumors that floated around town that she was gay. "You know how that goes," she laughed. "And it wasn't a problem because we had a good relationship," said Bennett. "It wasn't an issue."

Bennett and Packard arrived at Boston Medical Center to find a group of Cila's family members, state troopers and the State Police Chaplain already gathered there. Cila had passed away before Bennett and Packard arrived. His wife, Cheryl, appointed Bennett to be the family liaison, a go-between to deal with details she herself could not at that point. Packard, meanwhile, stood alone on the sidelines, in part because Bennett had rolled up her sleeves and set to work, but also because Bennett did not introduce Packard to anyone else in the crowd. "She knew that was my comfort level at the time," said Bennett. At the end of the night, after everyone else had gone, Cila's station commander approached her and asked if she needed a ride. In a barely audible voice, Bennett told him that her partner would be driving her home. "And he said, 'Excuse me?'" Bennett recalled. "And I said, 'My partner's here.' And at that point it was like, 'I don't care anymore.' ... That was my epiphany. I just didn't care anymore because in the scheme of things, what was important to me was my family and my friends and certainly Susan is a part of my family. I love her and I had just lost someone who I loved, and it was all relative with what was happening and I just didn't care. I said you know what? My sexuality is just a part of who I am and that it just wasn't an issue for me anymore."

It's the one good thing she has taken away from her friend's tragic death. "This was his way of helping me become more comfortable with who I am because he was very comfortable with who he was," Bennett said of Cila, a father of two children. "[He] was a lot of fun in life. He was who he was. This was the legacy from him for me."

Bennett delivered the eulogy at Cila's funeral. "That was the most difficult thing I've ever done in my life," she said, "besides coming out."

These days, Bennett, who works at the State Police Headquarters in Framingham, is much more at ease with being a more visible member of the LGBT community. For instance, she recently became an official member of GOAL/NE. "I knew it was there and I had supported them and I had gone to events while [Cambria] was involved, but I had never actively pursued membership," said Bennett. So, now I felt it was obviously important to do that." She sees her new post as a way to give back to the community. "I've been pretty blessed. Life's been good to me so far," quoting a lyric from the old Joe Walsh song. "At this stage of my career, I contemplated, now it's time for me to give something back." She especially hopes to show young LGBT people that they can be honest about their lives while not sacrificing their professional goals. "I think it was the right thing to do to take this position," said Bennett.

Yeah, but what about all those Gay Pride Parades? "I may evolve into a parade marcher," Bennett speculated. "But I'm not there yet. I look at it like, hey, baby steps." But she's quick to add, "This is who I am and this is where I'm at in my life. It shouldn't really matter what I do on my personal time as long as professionally I carry myself as best as I can."