Kate the Great

Even on a muggy Monday morning, it's immediately clear why legendary lesbian comedian Kate Clinton is at the top of her game. After 25 years in the business she's as fast and funny as ever, ad libbing zingers about politics and Provincetown. Read on for a sample of the wicked wit you can expect in Clinton's shows in Provincetown this summer.

Q: Thanks so much for speaking to me during this mourning period. I know the loss of Jesse Helms has hit you hard.
A: Thank you so much. It's been difficult. I am wearing shorts, but they're black. I think the news of the transgender man giving birth is what killed him.

Q: We should have thought of that sooner and induced labor.
A: What a horror show of a man. He was so racist and homophobic.

Q: Wasn't he 3000 years old?
A: That might have been Strom Thurmond. Too mean to die, as they say. I remember in, I think 1984, I went down to Raleigh Durham to do a benefit to fight his reelection campaign. And I was driving with my friend who was a community organizer there, and she was telling me horrible stories about his race baiting. And we saw what we thought was a log but turned out to be a snake. It was the most giant snake I've ever seen. And she screamed, "It's Jesse Helms!" and gunned it. It was like we were the Dykes of Hazzard. And that's really what he was, a giant speed bump.

Q: The scary thing is that he kept getting reelected.
A: Oh yeah. And he made the blueprint for fundraising by using gay scare tactics. And he really delivered his state to Reagan.

Q: So is there any Helms material in your set now?
A: The night of his death I was doing a show here in Provincetown, so we started with that. Oh, they screamed! I've been doing this bit where I say I've worked in Provincetown for 94 seasons -

Q: One season can feel like 94 seasons.
A: [laughs] And I say, "This is my last summer in Provincetown..." goading them into saying, "Aw". And then I add, "during the Bush regime," and they go nuts! We are eager for change.

Q: Provincetown audiences must be very fun.
A: They are. Depending on the weather.

Q: The weather, the drugs...
A: I'm telling you, it reminds me of when I was teaching and the kids thought we should have a snow day but we didn't. And they would take it out on me, as if I had called the superintendent. That's what it's like when it's rainy here. But Provincetown is wonderful. I get to try things out, and they're very clear with me about what works and what doesn't. It's going to get worse as the Olympics get closer. Then they'll think they can judge everything. They'll hold up little card: " 9.2, hated the dismount."

Q: I've never seen you perform in Provincetown and I always wondered if you changed your act at all. Throw in some jokes about tourists and parking or whatever.
A: It's a danger. You do want to do local stuff. But I also use summer as a workshop to try new stuff out, so when I go on the road in the fall I have material I'm sure of. But it's so tempting...like the year they changed the Carnival parade from night to day and all the queens were a wreck because they didn't want to be seen in the light of day. How could I not talk about that?

Q: That is what I love about you, that you're always doing new material.
A: Have you met my girlfriend? At the end of every show I get her critique. But she's learned never to tell me to not do a joke, because then that's exactly what I want to do. So now when she says she likes a joke I think there must be something wrong with it.

Q: Does she have a good sense of humor?
A: She has a fabulous sense of humor. Because English is a second language for her, she loves horrible puns. And slapstick. I can't tell you the number of times we've done pull my finger.

Q: This is our leadership! [Clinton's partner, Urvashi Vaid, is former executive director of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force.]
A: I know. But she is always pushing me to do more stuff on race and deep causes.

Q: How do you make these subjects funny?
A: I always feel that if I can get the right anger and angle on things that I'll try it. But it has been a real struggle. People say, "Oh George is so easy to make fun of," but I really have to look at it. I've become the designated Bush watcher. And not in the good way. It's heartbreaking to see how much damage can be done in seven and a half years.

Q: It's still weird to me that people are so down on Bush these days. It's like, who voted for him?
A: That's why my new book is called I Told You So. But you're right, I am hard pressed to explain his second term.

Q: I love the bit on your last CD about burning sage to purify the White House after Bush is out.
A: We're really going to do it. I'm organizing - and I put that in quotes, because my girlfriend who is an organizer is appalled at how I'm doing this - on January 19, the night before the inauguration, we are going to meet in DC and circle the White House and burn sage. Tell people to go to my website and get all the information.

Q: That reminds me of another thing to be sad about: Hillary.
A: It's been very interesting, because there I feel so much anger when I start talking about it. But I'm an adult. I'm democratically fluid. So while I might be a little heartbroken, I paraphrase Donald Rumsfeld and say you go to the polls with the candidate you have, not the one you wish to have. But it's an opportunity to talk about sexism and media bias. And I have certainly been encouraging people to get over themselves and vote. We can't not vote. The idea of Hillary voters going for McCain is. ...certainly not what feminists are going to do. Where is Karl Rove? Can we check his fax machine? The fact that he's on Fox News as an expert is amazing.

Q: Expert on what?
A: On bringing a president to a 19% approval rating? Yeah, let's listen to him. You see how I'm practically sputtering now? And how do I transform that into humor? Often, not well! But you know, I am mourning for George Carlin. That has been a great reminder. He was angry, and he kept doing it. You can be sputtering and still make people laugh. He was hilarious. I remember seeing him years ago and thinking, this is what I want to do.

Q: Who else has inspired you?
A: Carol Burnett, We don't do the same thing, but the power of seeing a woman make people laugh was wonderful. Lily Tomlin, though again we don't do the same thing.

Q: But she's political and progressive.
A: She has an amazing way of presenting people and characters. And I couldn't have gotten through the last seven years without Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert. Jon Stewart is giving the class on rhetoric that people aren't getting in school. He really showed how to take apart news. I really think he's had a huge effect. I remember watching one where he looked at how news shows introduce heinous ideas under cover of a question mark. "Is Hillary Clinton a Nazi?

Q: "Have you stopped beating your wife?"
A: Right. He has really saved my life.

Q: Though I worry when I hear that some people only get their news from Jon Stewart. Maybe some people only get their news from you?
A: That should frighten you more! But the eye he brings to the mainstream media - which they now call MSM which I think is wonderful, they clearly don't know that also means Men who have Sex with Men - I hope I bring that kind of eye to LGBT issues. I think people really want that. I think people long for that opportunity to use their brain.

Q: I feel like high school was a thousand years ago. Do they teach media analysis now? They should.
A: Or rhetoric. I had that. But then I studied Latin too. Thank God the Pope is bringing that back. I can understand every word he says.

Q: He's bringing everything back. I'm looking forward to the Inquisition.
A: Mmhmm! I think also that media analysis has shifted so much with the rise of blogging. That's a whole new media.

Q: You've been blogging all over the place.
A: I'm around like a bad penny.

Q: I miss your Hilarity Clinton video blogs. They were so funny.
A: Oh, we're starting up again in August. I do have a new book and apparently the publisher wants it. So I've been working on that and it starts August 1st. Or at least the deadline is August 1st. My shows are very scripted, which is a holdover from my days as an English teacher when I had to have a lesson plan. And the vlogs were very freeing. I would just write down a few words and go. It was very fun.

Q: So you're not planning for the August vlogs?
A: Actually, I want to do a little man on the street thing. Just sit on the bench at Spiritus and have people tell me their stories.

Kate Clinton plays at 7 p.m. Tuesday-Thursdays at The Crown and Anchor, 247 Commercial St., Provincetown. Visit www.kateclinton.com for more information about her performances, her new book, and the saging of The White House.