Evan Darling -- Pro racing's role model

Visit a parking lot in Provincetown or stroll through the South End, and you'd probably need a few extra hands to count the multitude of LGBT bumper stickers plastered on the rear ends of Subarus and Mini Coopers: rainbows, triangles, HRC logos, "Love makes a family," "Hate is not a family value," "Sorry I missed church, I was busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian."

But if you thought driving your My-Two-Moms-Mobile back and forth to daycare was a bold political act, try plastering a decal of your local gay bar on the side of some souped-up wheels, and speeding them around a racetrack in front of spectators fueled up on machismo and beer. Now that's an extreme sport.

"If there had been someone like me out there early on, maybe I would have been more in tune to follow my dream," says Evan Darling, America's only openly gay professional racecar driver. Darling has no problem showing his rainbow stripes; one of his first sponsors, its name emblazoned on his car, was his local Florida gay bar Georgie's Alibi. In fact, the LGBT community, including other sponsors like GayWheels.com, has often sped up to help Darling stay out and proud in the expensive world of professional racing, where competing in a single weekend race can cost as much as $30,000. The Andover, Mass., native hopes that his old stomping grounds will show its own support when he comes to Club Caf? on Mar. 18, to raise funds for his 2009 racing campaign.

"There aren't many other [LGBT] role models, so I think this is a really good thing," says Darling of his status as an out personality not only in professional sports, already a rarity, but arguably in the butchest of the batch: racecar driving. "Because I'm gay and do this on a professional level, it is good exposure for the community," he adds. "It might open up eyes."

Opening up eyes has not always been easy for Darling, who endured a difficult time coming out to his family back here in Massachusetts. He told his parents he was gay at age 18, and, "they just simply did not understand," says Darling, now 41. He soon moved out on his own, his relationship with his family strained and estranged. "It wasn't a good time of my life," he adds.

Likely not. Ironically, Darling's weekend return to Boston coincides with the city's annual St. Patrick's Day Parade in South Boston, the same celebration that his father - notorious legal eagle Chester Darling - successfully helped ban to LGBT marchers in a historic, unanimous Supreme Court ruling (Hurley v. Irish American Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual Group of Boston, 1995). "It made me feel awful," says the racer of his reaction at the time.

The elder Darling, who retired in 2006, was involved in a number of other cases in which he aligned with strongly conservative social politics concerning abortion clinic buffer zones, public displays of the Nativity, race-based admission policies, and other hot-button issues. In 2005, he represented the Catholic Action League in a bid to halt same-sex marriages in Massachusetts. "I gave him hell for that," sighs Darling.

Usually, though, Darling was the one catching hell. Like his sexual orientation, his interest in racing also met with criticism from his family. From his early childhood memories of playing with Matchbox cars to later racing BMX bikes and motorcycles, Darling has always felt the need for speed. But his parents disapproved of that, too, so he moved to Florida in 1994 and built up a successful landscaping business that he sold several years ago to concentrate on racing full time at a professional level. He has since accrued speedy success: he races in the Grand Am KONI Sports Car Challenge, was the SCCA 2005 SE Division ITA Champion and has won numerous divisional titles.

"I don't race in circles," explains Darling, describing his form of the sport for the vehicular challenged. "We race places like Lime Rock Park in Washington, D.C., and The Glen in New York. It's more of a Formula 1 Race type of track: we race on multiple miles-long hills in rain and at night. It's a very challenging sport."

It's also a pricey one for a self-funded racer. Darling remains up to the challenge if it brings more visibility to gays in pro racing, though he says he hasn't encountered much in the way of anti-gay reactions since starting his career, even when smooching his guy while spectators watch.

"I was at a race in Atlanta a few years back with my partner at the time," he recalls. "I did really well, everything was hunky dory, and it was one of those exciting moments. ... I had the trophy and everyone was standing around. He [his partner] walked over and laid a big, huge fat one on me in front of everyone. I had never hid the fact that I was with another man, but I never talked about it and nobody ever asked. When he gave me the big kiss, everyone saw it and looked. I got a few funny looks, but it really wasn't [an issue]."

His sexuality is at least slightly less of an issue with his family now, too. He remains fairly distant from his brother, Brian Darling, director of U.S. Senate Relations at The Heritage Foundation, a conservative think-tank that opposes same-sex marriage among its political stances. "We've had a harder time getting along," says Darling of his brother. "He's a little less understanding. ...We stay in touch because we're brothers and we love each other, but we don't see eye to eye on my lifestyle."

Darling may still not see eye to eye with his father, either, but he says that relationship has at least improved somewhat. "He's still very conservative," says Darling, though he adds that his father seems to deal better with his sexuality now than in the past. Darling also attempts to understand his father's perspective, too: while he calls some of the groups the elder Darling has represented "horrible," he also defends him. "He is not a horrible man," says Darling. He even says he understands some of his father's points, adding that cases such as the St. Patrick's Day parade have to be argued by an attorney from the perspective of objective legal merit, and not just as matters of passionate social opinion. Darling also notes that his father has taken up cases on behalf of LGBT clients, too, such as helping a Lawrence, Mass., gay and lesbian group obtain Pride parade permits after it was denied by city officials.

Still, Darling hopes he can be an unequivocal role model for the LGBT community. "For a lot of gay people, growing up you think you're a bad person," says Darling. "It's very difficult."

"If I had a role model at that time... it would have been a great boost for me. I didn't have that, but I hope I can provide it to help the community and some young people out there."

Evan Darling will appear at Club Caf? (209 Columbus Ave., Boston). on Wednesday, Mar. 18 from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. to sign autographs and provide a presentation on his racing efforts. The event will feature a cash bar, free appetizers and prizes. $20 Cover. For more info, visit edarlingenterprises.com.