Gay marriage :: Where it all began

Five years ago, A.C. Goldberg and Mary Shillue joined thousands of fellow Cantabrigians outside Cambridge City Hall in counting down to midnight on May 17, when the city became the first in the United States to begin offering legal marriage licenses to same-sex couples. The two had been in a relationship for a year, but already knew they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. Last weekend, on the fifth anniversary of that hallowed evening, the couple returned to City Hall on the afternoon of May 17 to tie the knot, part of a celebration organized by Mayor E. Denise Simmons to commemorate five years of marriage equality.

Goldberg and Shillue stood together in the center of the City Council chamber, surrounded by a crowd of about 80 people who had turned out to celebrate Cambridge's role in the march toward equal marriage rights, as Simmons, who is also a justice of the peace, officiated the ceremony. As the two exchanged vows they were ringed by an impromptu gathering of volunteer bridesmaids and groomsmen from the crowd - most of them strangers to the couple. The room burst into applause when Simmons pronounced them legally married.

This was not the couple's first wedding ceremony. Last June Goldberg and Shillue held exchanged vows in a ceremony attended by family and friends, but said they kept putting off the trip to City Hall to file for a marriage license. When they saw a flyer advertising the anniversary celebration at City Hall - where couples were given the opportunity to be married by a justice of the peace - they decided it was a fitting moment to make it legal.

"We were here five years ago as a couple, and we witnessed the first marriages, and we cheered on with the crowds," said Goldberg. "And though we already had our own wedding with our family and friends we felt like today would be a good day to be legally married."

The couple - Shillue in particular - had volunteered their time to help secure marriage equality in Massachusetts, doing phone banks for MassEquality and turning out at the constitutional conventions at the State House, where advocates successfully defeated an amendment to ban same-sex marriage in 2007. Standing outside City Hall five years ago they felt confident in their relationship, said Goldberg, but with the right to marry under attack they worried whether they would ever get the chance to be legally wed.

"I think at that point we knew we were going be together. We didn't know, my being a transgender male, [and] not having legally changed my gender yet, and Mary being a woman, that we would ever be able to realize our marriage legally," said Goldberg.

After Simmons finished the ceremony the couple enjoyed their first dance in the center of the chamber, serenaded by the jazz band Pinchback Blues. Simmons then called on "all the single ladies" in the crowd to assemble for Shillue's bouquet toss, but after some good-natured protests from the crowd the mayor opened up the floor to the single ladies and the single fellows (for the record, one of the women beat out the bouquet-grabbing men). After the wedding Simmons addressed the crowd and quipped that if they met anyone who had stereotypical ideas about what an LGBT wedding looks like, they can say that they saw one in person and "Prince didn't sing 'Purple Rain' in stilettos."

Other couples used the occasion to renew their wedding vows, among them Marcia Kadish and Tanya McCloskey of Malden, the first couple to be legally married in Massachusetts. McCloskey said their place in the annals of LGBT history was an accident; when couples began pouring into City Hall at the stroke of midnight on May 17, 2004, they were number 56 in line to fill out their application for a marriage license. But when they reached the courthouse later that day to pick up the license, they discovered they were the first to do so.

One of the highlights of that evening was the energy and sense of celebration in the streets as thousands turned out to cheer on the couples lining up to apply for marriage licenses, Kadish recalled. Earlier that evening she and McCloskey had attended an interfaith blessing service at a nearby church for couples planning to tie the knot. They heard the crowds cheering as they walked to City Hall, and when they arrived well wishers handed them flowers. When Kadish and McCloskey finally emerged from City Hall with their completed application they too were treated to the raucous throng's adoration.

"The night before we were all married, it was two in the morning when we came out of City Hall, and there were still a thousand people yelling, 'Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!' as we were coming down the stairs. It was a blessing," said Kadish.

The couple's photo wound up splashed across local and national media. McCloskey said people still recognize them and offer their congratulations.

"Since we've been married it's incredible how much more community we have. ... We'll be standing getting ice cream somewhere, and they'll come up to us, congratulate us. It was so heartwarming, it's lovely," said McCloskey.

Beverly and Regina Jenkins, a South Quincy couple who formerly lived in Cambridge, also renewed their vows in the City Council chambers, but it took some persuading on the part of Regina.

"My wife caught me off guard, but it was okay," said Beverly, laughing.

"We knew about the event, but the part we didn't know about was there was going to be a wedding and renewal of vows, and once we got here and found that out I said, this would be something nice for us to do. And it took a little coaxing, only because she was caught off guard," said Regina.

A couple for about 30 years, the two married last August at the East Congregational Church in East Milton. They have three daughters and four grandchildren. Beverly said her mother, who passed away before they were married, was confident that at some point in the future her daughter would be able to marry Regina, and she was strongly supportive of their relationship.

"I always knew that one day it would happened. God rest my mother's soul, she always said, just be patient," said Beverly.

David Croud and Dana Leet, a North Cambridge couple who married five years ago, also renewed their vows at that afternoon. They have not been active in the LGBT community, said Croud, but a lesbian friend told them about the city hall event, and they decided to attend. He said they hope to be more involved in activism in the future; as such they plan to attend a rally organized by the group Join the Impact Massachusetts on the day California's Supreme Court announces its decision in the case challenging the legality of the state's Proposition 8.

"This was the first time we've ever started to participate in any of that. ... For some reason we decided to start getting out, not that we're closeted. Everybody knows," said Croud.

The anniversary celebration also included remarks from Simmons, who is gay, and two other fixtures of Cambridge LGBT politics, the Rev. Irene Monroe and Sue Hyde of the National Lesbian and Gay Task Force. Monroe called on the crowd to celebrate the milestone of five years of marriage equality, but she urged them to remember LGBT people in California who last November endured the setback of Proposition 8.

"As Massachusetts residents we're really blessed, and I thank all those 'activist judges' who voted on the side of justice. ... But let us not forget our brothers and sisters left behind," said Monroe.

Hyde recounted her quest to ensure that her friends Susan Shepherd and Marcia Hams were the first couple to apply for a marriage license. The three camped out on the steps of City Hall the evening of May 15, 2004, to ensure that they were the first in line the next day.

"It rained that night, but luckily we had some chocolate and red wine to see us through," said Hyde.

By noon the next day a crowd started forming, and by that evening Hyde dubbed the thousands gathered in the streets "Marriagestock."

Simmons said when the Goodridge decision was released in November 2003 she was determined that Cambridge would begin issuing licenses as soon as possible. A city councilor at the time, she worked with then-Mayor Michael Sullivan and other councilors and city officials to plan the midnight celebration. The beginning of marriage equality in Massachusetts is an American civil rights milestone, said Simmons.

"[On May 17, 2004] there were tears and applause by the public that recognized separate-but-equal didn't work the first time and didn't work now. There were tears because 2004 represented an important step in the country's continued evolution towards fulfilling its ideals," said Simmons. "Two-hundred twenty-eight years after the Declaration of Independence proclaimed that all men were created equal, 141 years after the country abolished slavery, 84 years after women won the right to vote and participate as full citizens, and 40 years after the Civil Rights Act codified the rights of minorities, a state government finally recognized the love between two men [or] two women was every bit as special as the lvoe between one man and one woman."